Life as a Foster Parent: Ms. Anderson’s Story
After years spent raising her two biological sons and being a surrogate mom to the children of struggling friends, Shirley Anderson suddenly found herself as an empty nester after they’d all grown up and moved out.
“I was lost, I didn’t know what to do,” recalls the Bowie resident.
The Board of Child Care helped Ms. Anderson become a mother again by training her as a foster parent. In turn, Ms. Anderson has provided a safe, loving home for numerous children within BCC’s DC Foster Care program. The single mom has adopted two children through the program – Todd, age 5, and Shawn, age 4 – and is in the process of adopting a 21-month-old girl. She also has a 12-year-old adopted daughter, Davida, through Catholic Charities.
“I have a lot of love inside of me and I wanted to make a difference,” explains the 60-year-old Ms. Anderson about why, after so many years of raising children, she wanted to return to the task. “I’ve always been a mom and that’s all I know to be.”
On a chilly evening last winter, Ms. Anderson’s home was warm and cozy inside where her four children congregated around the fireplace in their pajamas watching an educational video on the television. Even though it was close to bedtime, the children were boisterous and playful. Ms. Anderson didn’t seem to mind, even after having worked a full day at her federal government job. Her job, she noted, was just to pay the bills. Where her real fulfillment comes is from her children. “They make a difference in my life,” she says.
The best part about being a foster parent is making a positive impact in the life of a child who needs a loving parent, Ms. Anderson says. “Even if I only have them for one month, I believe the love and attention I give them can make an impact.”
Friends and acquaintances have admitted to her that they’ve considered foster parenting, but gave up the idea fearing they’d become too emotionally attached to children who would eventually leave their home. Ms. Anderson says this has been hard for her too, but she has stayed in touch with the children she temporarily fostered, and she continues to give advice to the biological family members with whom the children were reunited, which is another form of fulfillment for Ms. Anderson.
She points out that before becoming a foster parent, people need to “Just know in your heart and your mind that this is truly what you want to do and that you can put your all into it. Ask yourself, ‘What difference can I make in this child’s life? What can I do to support their emotional needs?’ That’s a big job.”
But Ms. Anderson added that the Board of Child Care staff helps every step of the way. “It’s like a family,” she says of the DC Foster Care Program staff. “Anytime we call them, they are available.”
Learn more about our DC Foster Care Program.
